When I was pregnant with Jacob I had a lot of people tell me: “Watch out! Having two kids isn’t just twice as much work…it’s more like ten times as much work!”. Now, granted, I’ve only had two kids for 5 months now, but it’s really not as hard as everyone said it would be. In fact, I’d say that having 2 kids is not even twice as much work as having 1.
When I was teaching, I had up to 22 kids under my care for 6+ hours a day. So, having only 2 kids that I love unconditionally feels like a pretty sweet deal (plus, they both still take naps. That helps). In both the school and the home scenario, though, the only way I’m able to manage kids is through a simple formula of routine, organization, and discipline.
We have routines for everything in our day: wake up time, meal time, getting dressed, getting shoes and coats on when we have to leave the house, nap time, clean up, bath time, bed time. We have David so well trained now that all I have to say is “it’s time for snack and story” and he cleans up all of his toys and goes to sit on the couch to wait for his snack. This allows me to get his snack ready while he’s cleaning up, and it means we have no battles over how this part of our day should go. We’ve practiced it a gazillion times and he just knows what to do and what to expect. The funny thing is, if we ever stray from our routine David gets really upset and tells us the “correct” way to do it!
Organization is a huge help when you have kids. Having children is like living in the middle of a tornado–everything and everyone seem to be in a constant state of upheaval.
One of the most important parts of my personal organization is our schedule. I keep a fairly strict yet flexible schedule. What I mean by that is that we have a set plan for how each day in the week goes, but we adjust what that looks like as needed. For instance, Jacob can still nap in his carseat if we’re out and about during the day. I know, however, that when he’s older and won’t sleep in his carseat any more, I’ll have to be home for his naps and we’ll have to adjust our schedule to accommodate his new needs.
I also sit down every Sunday and fill out a weekly calendar that includes our activities, chores I need to do, errands that need to be run, our dinner menu, and even when I’ll exercise.
I write my schedule out on a magnetic whiteboard and I stick it on the front of my fridge. I like this method because it doesn’t require me pulling up an app on my phone and Jon can see it just as easily as I can. Plus, the teacher in me still likes writing on white boards. Having and keeping to a schedule allows your routines to be more effective because everyone knows what to expect each day.
Built into my schedule are things like dinner prep. I always prep dinner during the boys’ nap so that when it’s actually time to make dinner everything’s ready and I can just throw it in the pan (or, even better, it’s already in the crock pot or roasting in the oven and all I have to do is take it out to eat it). Really, if there’s anything I can do ahead of time to make my time with the boys go easier, I do it.
I’m not going to get too into this subject right now, because that could really be a whole series of posts on its own. And, admittedly, discipline is one of my weakest areas as a mother. But, I do know how important it is and I work at it every day. Here’s how discipline relates to my theme of managing the kids, though. Kids NEED boundaries. When the kids know what is expected of them, they tend to live up to those expectations. When kids know there are consistent consequences to their actions, they learn how better to control their behavior. By me not spending 4 hours a day chasing wild banshees through my house (OK, that actually IS how most days are…) I can focus on more important tasks. We can move through our day more quickly, with more sanity, and have more time for the fun stuff when behavior is (mostly) in check.
So, that’s it. Having kids IS tough. I’ll never deny that. But with a little preparation and consistency, your job can be a whole lot easier!