20 Ways My 2-Year Old is Like a Puppy

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I’m a full-time stay at home mom. I spend my days playing with my kids and my dog–perhaps I spend too much time playing with my kids and my dog. As I was watching my 2-year old playing with our dog the other day it struck me: toddlers and puppies have a lot in common. Here are my top observations in toddler/puppy similarities:

  1. They have endless energy–If we could find a way to harness the energy of 2-year old boys and 7-year old Border Collies I’m pretty sure we could power third world countries.
  2. My primary role as mother/owner is to keep them from killing themselves on a daily basis.
  3. They like to chew on things–especially things that are not meant to be chewed on.
  4. They like getting their heads rubbed.
  5. They enjoy playing in the toilet–putting toys in it, drinking from it, splashing around in the water. Lovely.
  6. They will eat things that really should not be eaten, and look at you like you’re a crazy woman when you jam a finger into their mouth to swipe it out.
  7. They pee on the floor and don’t clean it up. I really wish they would at least clean it up.
  8. They don’t wear out–If they get 5 minutes of rest they’re ready to go again at 100% capacity. No rest for the weary (mom).
  9. They enjoy lying in mud puddles and digging in the dirt. But, really, who doesn’t?
  10. They need regular grooming–see #9
  11. They love balls. Ball?! Did somebody say ball?
  12. They are small, squishy, and cuddly–if you can catch them long enough to squish and cuddle them.
  13. They want to wrestle. All. The. Time.
  14. They spread out on the couch/bed/chair that you were about to sit on–and they lie in such a ridiculous, haphazard position that there’s not a square inch of space left for you to possibly squeeze in.
  15. They like to bite themselves–not quite sure why they find this so enjoyable.
  16. They go crazy at the mention of words like “park” or “treat”.
  17. They need their “claws” trimmed about every 2 seconds.
  18. They make loud, obnoxious noises when they aren’t getting enough attention–and won’t stop until you quit whatever unimportant task you were doing and get down on the floor with them again.
  19. More often than not, they smell a bit funky. True story.
  20. They give unconditional love and I couldn’t imagine the world without them!

You Know You’re From Seattle When…

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Jon and I were watching a movie recently that had a scene *supposedly* set in Seattle. Everything about it was so wrong, though, that it actually got me a bit worked up. How could they portray my city–and “my people”–in such a distorted light? I’ve lived in and around Seattle  my whole life, and I’ll be the first to admit that we Seattleites are a bit quirky. Living in a rain cloud is a unique experience and it makes for some interesting people. I am proud to be from Seattle–the real Seattle, not the one from the movies. You know that you’re from Seattle when:

  • You know at least 5 different ways to say”rain”.
  • “Barefoot” is an acceptable footwear option, even if there’s snow on the ground.
  • You own your own espresso machine and/or the baristas at your local coffee shop know you by name.
  • You don’t carry (or even own) an umbrella. Umbrellas are for amateurs.
  • You own 4 pairs of sunglasses yet you don’t know where a single one of them is.
  • You flock outside with the masses on the first sunny day in the spring that reaches above 60 degrees. You don your shorts/t-shirt/bikini and join the throngs of people swimming in frigid lakes and sunbathing in parks.
  • You sit in front of a SAD light every day in the winter.
  • You have seen fish flying at the market and have taken photos with the Fremont Troll. You’ve even licked the bubblegum wall.
  • You own a dog and treat him/her/them like your child/ren rather than as a pet.
  • You say things like “The mountain is out today” and “Look at those bright clouds! What a beautiful day!”.
  • You see nothing wrong with wearing socks under your sandals.
  • You check bridge and ferry reports along with your traffic reports.
  • You know that summer doesn’t begin until July 5th.
  • You know what a geoduck is (bonus points if you know the geoduck song or have actually eaten the creepy things).
  • You get a “snow day” off school because there’s a light dusting of snow on the grass.
  • You cry if there’s a light dusting of snow on the grass and you don’t get a snow day.
  • You have smoked marijuana in public. And it was legal. (Just for the record, I’ve never done this but it still weirds me out when I see other people doing it).
  • You commute to work on your bike in the rain/snow/sleet/hail.
  • You grow rhubarb in your back yard (or have a neighbor/friend/co-worker who brings it to you by the bagful in the summer).
  • You chastise people who don’t properly recycle or compost their waste.
  • You homebrew.
  • You know how to properly pronounce the place names “Puyallup”, “Sequim”, and “Des Moines”.
  • You think of rocks, not sand, when you think of beaches.
  • You say “pop” instead of “soda”.
  • You’ve cruised down Alki Beach in a convertible on a sunny day.
  • You pronounce the word “flag” as “flay-g”.
  • You’ve ridden on the monorail.
  • You call that major interstate that runs from California to Canada “I-5” (what the heck is “The 5”?)
  • You are accustomed to seeing at least 7 varieties of apples in your grocery store.
  • You’ve witnessed cars bouncing down an icy hill like they’re in a pinball machine.
  • You keep reusable grocery bags in your car. And you use them.

I really could keep going all day, but you get the picture. I love you, Seattle!

20 Things I Do That I Never Thought I Would Do (Now That I’m A Mom)

Motherhood has changed me, for better or worse! A lot has changed in my life since becoming a mom. For instance, before becoming a mom I never thought I would:

  1. photograph poop.
  2. share photos of poop with my friends and family.
  3. eat Mac and Cheese for lunch 5 straight days in a row.
  4. get dressed in the morning–almost EVERY morning–by changing out of black yoga pants (my P.J’s) into black yoga pants (my “outfit”).
  5. count a solo trip to the grocery store as “me time”.
  6. choose a restaurant based on the following criteria: noise level (the louder the better), food selection (chicken nuggets must be on the menu), and whether the high chairs have properly functioning restraint devices.
  7. own 57 balls (and counting…).
  8. actually look forward to dentist visits (one of the only times I get to be by myself, lay in a *relatively* comfy chair and zone out for an hour).
  9. get poop or spit-up on my clothes and debate whether it’s really worth changing my outfit.
  10. spend my few-and-far-between date nights talking about the very children I left just a moment ago.
  11. enjoy folding laundry–sometimes (baby clothes are so cute!).
  12. use plastic party cups to scoop poop out of the tub (in another life those held a nice, cold adult beverage).
  13. schedule my showers like I used to schedule hair appointments–phone calls and calendar entries required.
  14. get a song stuck in my head only to realize it’s the made-up tune played by the baby bouncer or the jumperoo.
  15. forget to shut the bathroom door when guests are in my house.
  16. let the dog lick of the baby’s face after a meal.
  17. wake up to the baby’s cries, get dressed for the day and walk out of my room only to realize that it’s 3 AM
  18. flash an innocent bystander when the baby suddenly rips the nursing cover off of his face.
  19. know every. single. word. in the “Birthday Party” episode of Blue’s Clues.

And, finally–

20. love two tiny people with a love so big that I would give my very life for them.
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